The Titanic Awards

It does get you thinking about what they might be serving in their soup, though.

(8 votes, average: 5.63 out of 10)

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Air Travel airplane, flight, fly, livery, niki, paint, worst

Name Carl Hoffman
Who? Author of the new book The Lunatic Express. He is also a contributing editor at National Geographic Traveler, Wired and Popular Mechanics.  In two decades of reporting he has flown with missionaries in New Guinea and bush pilots in the Sudan and Congo, driven the Baja 1,000 and once sailed an open dinghy 250 miles over eleven days.  His three teenage children, he claims, find him boring.  You can find him online at thelunaticexpress.com.
Age 50
Countries Visited 65

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Bus Greyhound LA to DC, the last leg of Lunatic.  Clean, on time, but like traveling through a nation of lost souls and ‘Greyhound Steak Houses (McDonald’s) – the standard luggage was plastic garbage bags.  Need I say more?
2. Worst City for Driving Dhaka, Bangladesh.  Traffic is so thick and choking you could walk across the cars faster than driving.  But then you’d have to climb over horse carts and bicycle rickshaws and auto rickshaws…
3. Worst Toilet In steerage on the Bukit Siguntang across Indonesia; two holes for every thousand people, roaches the size of half dollars scuttling past, an inch of liquid on the floor, darkness.
4. Worst Souvenir The sheepskin coat in China that was, um, not well cured.  The coroner who arrived at my door two weeks after returning home wasn’t amused.
5. Worst Ride on the Back of an Animal The reindeer on Sakhalin Island in the Russian Far East with the Oroki people.  He refused to move a muscle, so we ate him.  The raw femur marrow was pink and slippery, just like snot.

Agree or disagree with him? Take the new 2010 worst travel survey >>

Famous Travelers Carl Hoffman, lunatic express, National Geographic, popular mechanics, wired, worst

(5 votes, average: 6.40 out of 10)

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Air Travel airline, australian, delays, jetstar, on-time, tiger airways, worst

A not with a PIN code was found taped to the security gate at Dubbo City Airport in NSW, Australia.

To avoid any confusion, the note said “Gate Access Code,” and even provided a few helpful tips such as  “please touch pad softly” and “remember code to re-enter.”

(10 votes, average: 6.80 out of 10)

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Air Travel airport security, dubbo city, fail, PIN, worst

Name Seth Stevenson
Who? Author of Grounded: A Down to Earth Journey Around the World and a contributing writer for Slate. His work has also appeared in the New York Times, New York, Newsweek, Rolling Stone, and other publications.  Seth is a multiple Lowell Thomas Award winner and was excerpted three times in the Best American Travel Writing series. He currently lives in Washington, D.C.
Age 35
Countries Visited 31

Titanic Award Nominations
1. Worst Drink Some sort of strange Russian moonshine served at a bar in Vladivostok. “You know how improperly distilled alcohol can make you go blind?” my girlfriend said, after taking a sip and grimacing. “This tastes like blind.”
2. Worst Tourist Trap Those tiny towns on the Mexican coast that exist solely as cruise ship ports. (Yes, I was on a cruise ship, which I acknowledge was my first mistake. I plead extenuating circumstances.) You are almost literally trapped amid the jewelry stores and t-shirt shops if you can’t find a bicycle or a bus and escape down the road to the next village.
3. Worst Train Ride An overnight train in India. There were swarms of cockroaches scaling the wall next to my head as I attempted to sleep. It took a decent amount of scotch guzzled from a flask before I could pretend they weren’t there.
4. Worst Toilet Leaving aside the countless spider-infested outhouses all over the globe, I’d have to go with Moscow’s Leningradsky Railway Terminal. There were plumbing tools scattered in the sinks because the guy’d given up on fixing the leaks. The squat toilets were freckled with horrifying human matter of every variety. Adding insult to repulsion: They charge a fee to use these!
5. Worst Hotel I understand the utility of Tokyo’s capsule hotels. But staying the night in one was a miserably claustrophobic experience. Also, I’m fairly certain the dude in the pod across the way was masturbating.

Famous Travelers grounded, Grounded: A Down to Earth Journey Around the World, seth stevenson, sethstevenson.com, slate, worst

Name Simon Reeve
Who? An award-winning BBC TV presenter and bestselling author.  Simon has traveled the world making BBC TV programs that mix travel with current affairs.  His books include The New York Times bestseller The New Jackals: Ramzi Yousef, Osama bin Laden and the future of terrorism, which warned of a new age of apocalyptic terrorism (back in 1998!). Find him on YouTube at shootandscribble. His website is simonreeve.co.uk
Age 37
Countries Visited +100

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Meal Zebu penis soup at a roadside stall in Madagascar while travelling around the Equator. A zebu is a type of tropical cattle. The dish is as awful as it sounds.
2.  Worst Toilet A basic outhouse on a remote island in western Indonesia. It wasn’t much more than a stick platform extending off a low ridge, designed to dump business straight into the sea. But I had to go during low tide, and hungry village pigs were waiting eagerly below, fighting their way up through the toilet hatch from underneath, trying to eat more than just my arse.
3. Worst Airport Mogadishu, Somalia. As a UN flight landed briefly in Mogadishu, quickly dropping off just two colleagues and me, a gun-battle broke-out at the airfield. The only other planes were bringing in bundles of qat, or khat, the local narcotic of choice, which we had to buy in bunches for the team of heavily-armed local mercenaries who protected us. I went to the local market and bought a Somali diplomatic passport in my own name from a man called Mr Big Beard.
4. Worst Hotel I’ve visited dozens of places untroubled by even medieval hygiene standards, but a dark, dank, mouldy hotel room in Dushanbe, Tajikistan, was particularly memorable. I was standing at a sink, vainly waiting for brown water to turn clear and watching two huge cockroaches mating or wrestling, when I trod on a sharp rat-trap the size of a house-brick.
5. Worst City for Driving Bangkok is still terrible for driving. Endless hold-ups with cars and trucks belching out toxic crap. I’ve been stuck in jams for hours there, retching from the fumes. And nobody switches-off their engine. It would be healthier to suck on a hosepipe running from the exhaust.

Famous Travelers author, bbc, new jackals, presenter, shootandscribble, simonreeve.co.uk. simon reeve, worst

Name Kim Mance
Who? Host of Galavanting.tv and editor of the online travel magazine GoGalavanting.com. She also writes a bunch of travel stuff around the internet (eg The Huffington Post) and is host of TBEX ‘10, a gathering of travel bloggers and new media writers.
Age 31
Countries Visited 33

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Cliché Found in Travel Writing “I’ll definitely be back soon.” Yes, we’ve all wanted to return to a place. We get it.
2. Worst Airline Air Tran. When the flight attendant began screaming in my face, the first thought that came to mind was, “Hmmm, I wonder if she’s bi-polar or just really hates her job.” Either way, it didn’t bode well that for the next few moments of flight prep as I tried to turn off my cell phone as quickly as possible while she continued to scream. And though the other passengers were all looking at me as if to say, “Don’t worry, we know it’s not okay: But the tickets were cheap — and they lost our baggage too”, I couldn’t help but look at my friend and giggle and while thinking to myself that shouting at passengers is inappropriate, whether or not I turned off my cell phone within a split second of notifying my husband the flight was ridiculously delayed. But that giggle did not please her in the slightest and she threatened to throw me off the plane. Wow. It was then I decided that I would never again fly Air Tran. Ever, ever.
3. Worst City for Driving Tirana, Albania. Driving in Albania was both one of the worst and most exhilarating experiences of my life. I was driving, but on parade. It’s one of the places on earth where  women are quite expected to stay in the passenger seat. And when they don’t it’s a downright public exhibition. But I was legally allowed to drive — so I did.  Traffic police at various intersections neglected their duties to gawk at me, pedestrians stopped to stare. Male drivers glared as though I might as well have been a mass murderer. For I dared to drive. And in the meantime, I seamlessly negotiated traffic that was similar to what I would imagine to be Parisians on crack.
4. Worst Ride on an Animal Jerusalem, Israel.  Soon after being lifted into the air atop the Mount of Olives overlooking Jerusalem’s Old City, the camel seemed sad and I seemed clichéd. Then after mere moments, the camel — defeated — bent down and I paid its owner some Shekels. I quickly wished I were back in the Arab Quarter eating greasy falafels marveling at citizens carrying weapons and learning to play a lute. Followed, of course, by a very chewy cup of coffee served by the charming shopkeeper.
5. Worst Beer Brussels, Belgium (surprisingly) Before I really liked beer much, a friend convinced me to taste raspberry fruit beer in Belgium. It made me want to vomit. It turns out, I was more of a Guinness girl. Sorry, Belgium. I love thee otherwise, and have since realized many of your beers are delicious and nuanced; but that was some seriously icky stuff.

Famous Travelers air train, albania, camel ride, Galavanting.tv, GoGalavanting.com, Kim Mance, TBEX, worst, worst beer

Name Steve Keenan
Who? Online Travel Editor of The Sunday Times
Age 52
Countries Visited 44

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Airline Delta – did it ever have any frills?
2. Worst Flight Cuzco – Lima: had to wait to offload passenger and a goat.
3. Worst Airport Luton. It charges to drop passengers off. It even charges for clear plastic bags. And it charges to fast track immigration. Morally bankrupt.
4. Worst Hotel Mendip Lodge, Frome, Somerset, UK – don’t think the sausage touched the pan. The egg bounced. Terrible decor. Sadly, it burnt down three years ago.
5. Worst Souvenir Fake five-foot palm tree from a restaurant in Miami. (It was a bet.) Customs at Heathrow were so astonished they never checked the suspicious coconuts.

Famous Travelers Steve Keenan, The Sunday Times, timesonline, timesonline.co.uk, travel editor, worst, worsts

(5 votes, average: 7.80 out of 10)

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uncategorized japan, japanese toilet, scary, worst

If one wanted to put a positive spin on this exhibit at a Polish zoo, it may help to remind people that animals aren’t mean to live in zoos.

But that’s not exactly the intention. It’s to show that people are animals as well. Next best thing, perhaps.  Deputy director Ewa Zbornikowska said the project is “a playful attempt to inspire people to think about the place of humans in the universe.”

The man and woman will spend the day in a former monkey cage grooming each other, keeping a fire going and staring back at zoo visitors. No mating rituals are planned.

(4 votes, average: 7.00 out of 10)

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Tourism caveman, cavemen, exhibit, weird, worst, worst exhibit, zoo

Here are a few unwanted souvenirs.

(3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 10)

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Videos sunburn, sunburnt, worst

(8 votes, average: 1.25 out of 10)

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Videos belly flop, bellyflop, most painful, worst

Name Sean Keener
Who? CEO and Co-Founder of the BootsnAll Travel Network.  He has been building travel guide and community websites since 1998.  Sean and his Aussie business partner did a newspaper delivery route to keep rice and beans on the table from 1999 through 2002 while dot coms blew up, and learned the ropes of web based publishing. Since then, The BootsnAll Travel Network has grown to 30+ Travel Guides and Theme Travel Guides like Travel Gear Blog and Hostel booking, serving over 3 million travelers per month.
Age 36

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Bus Ride The 30-hour Bus ride from Golmud, China to Lhasa, Tibet.  There was not an actual road, it was very cold (due to the roughly 5000-meter mountain passes) and the bus driver was blasting the same clangy music tape over and over again while folks smoked chain smoked cigarettes throughout the ride.
2. Worst Hostel The old Banana Bungalow in Santa Barbara, CA.  It was a half done/silo.  It stank, was dirty and noisy with heaps of Irish students getting smashed and barfing all over the place.  This hostel is out of business now.
3. Worst Train Ride Any train ride in India.  After a while, when I started chillin’, they became the best!
4. Worst City for Driving Delhi, India. Huge growth and lagging infrastructure create traffic jams all hours of the day.  Throw in cows on every street and it’s loads of fun!
5. Worst Toilet Trans-Siberian train going west.  No one cleaned it for days.  Lots of people got drunk on the train which led to barfing and shitting all over.  After more than four days, it was not pretty.

Famous Travelers bootsnall, bootsnall.com, hostel booking, sean keener, travel gear blog, worst

Name Wendy Perrin
Who? Condé Nast Traveler’s consumer news editor. She writes a practical advice column called “The Perrin Report,” as well as features on a wide variety of travel topics, and is the author of Wendy Perrin’s Secrets Every Smart Traveler Should Know. She’s an award-winning authority on consumer travel issues (2005 Travel Journalist of the Year and Lowell Thomas winner). She is frequently on television and radio offering travel advice and discussing trends and issues. (Appearances include The Oprah Winfrey Show, The Today Show, Good Morning America). She resides in the New York City area with her husband and two sons.  Follow her popular blog on http://perrinpost.com
Countries Visited 73

Titanic Nominations
Worst Bus Ride Laos. The bumpiest 11 hours of my life, on roads so excruciatingly potholed we averaged 12 miles per hour, were on a bus from Luang Prabang up to Luang Nam Tha in the northern hill-tribe country. It took my lumbar spine six months to recover.
Worst Flight Risking our lives to fly from Luang Nam Tha back to Luang Prabang–in a mechanically challenged Chinese-built Yak-12 prop plane– because we couldn’t bear the prospect of the return bus ride.
Worst City for Driving Venice. (Kidding.) Florence! You get caught on narrow one-way streets that dead-end — streets you share with garbage trucks, delivery vans, and bicycles — and the signage is somewhere between abysmal and nonexistent.
Worst Toilet The most repulsive toilet I’ve ever encountered was at Tiger Leaping Gorge in Yunnan Province in western China. Trust me, you don’t want to hear the details.
Worst Camel Ride Through the desert near the Pyramids, only because I was leaning forward–precariously and painfully–clutching my four-year-old in front of me, trying to keep him from falling off the wildly swaying animal.  To give you an idea of how bumpy that ride was, the moment my six-year-old descended from his camel, his tooth fell out!

agree or disagree? take the 2010 worst travel survey

Famous Travelers china, Condé Nast Traveler, http://perrinpost.com, Laos, Perrin Report, Wendy Perrin, worst

In terms of size and volume of traffic, the Arc de Triumphe is hard to beat.  Plus it has that magic ingredient: French divers.

(4 votes, average: 7.75 out of 10)

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Land Travel, Videos arc de triumphe, l'src de triumphe, roundabout, triumph, worst

Worst airline for on-time arrival: Atlantic Southeast Airlines

SOURCE: US Dept of Transportation  –  stats from first quarter 2009

(4 votes, average: 10.00 out of 10)

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Air Travel, Survey Results atlantic southeast, most delayed, On-Time Arrival, worst

Agree or disagree with the results? take the 2010 survey >>

(No Ratings Yet)

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Survey Results aurora, harbor rio de janeiro, lamest, natural wonder, paricutin volcano, worst

Agree or disagree with the results? take the 2010 survey >>

(No Ratings Yet)

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Survey Results, Tourism chichen itza, christ redeemer, colosseum, great wall china, lamest, machu picchu, petra, taj mahal, world wonders, worst

photo via flickr:  Erick Muñiz and Texas to Mexico composite

Travel agent Steven Greenbaum of Pisa Brothers Travel in New York was asked to book a trip with a pet Chihuahua.  The  traveler wanted to take the dog to Chihuahua, Mexico. Why?  To help the pet discover his roots.

Source: Travel + Leisure

(6 votes, average: 9.83 out of 10)

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Food, Photos, Sea Travel, Tourism Chihuahua, mexico, travel agent, worst

Name Thomas Kohnstamm
Who? Has written over a dozen Lonely Planet guidebooks before he went on to write the funny, truthful, behind-the-scenes-of-guidebook-writing bestseller: Do Travel Writers Go to Hell?: A Swashbuckling Tale of High Adventures, Questionable Ethics, and Professional Hedonism. He has also contributed to Travel + Leisure, Time Out New York, Forbes and numerous other publications. He is at work on a new book about the first Amazonian to attend Oxford.
Age 33
Countries Visited 50+

Titanic Nominations
1. Worst Hostel I’ll never forget the smell of the hostel in Costa Rica (back in ’98) with the decomposing rat under the bed.
2. Worst Bus Ride Nighttime Greyhound from Port Authority to DC. Hands down. Another one that wasn’t terrible – but was rather funny – happened on a bus in Venezuela: a Dutch friend (who couldn’t read Spanish) overlooked the “urination only” sign on the bathroom door. After taking care of business, he was accosted by the bus stewardess. She promptly checked the stall, upbraided him in front of the other passengers and fined him the equivalent of $12. He tried to deny it, but she publicly refuted him with all sorts of graphic evidence. I hadn’t laughed that hard in a long time.
3. Worst Street Food Random pig organs reheated atop a sheet of corrugated metal. No idea which organs they were. Protein is hard to come by in some parts of the Andes.
4. Worst TV Travel Personality I have a fair amount of respect for anyone who can pull off a travel show. I will say that if I were truly lost in the middle of nowhere that I’d rather run into Survivorman Les Stroud than the relatively more famous Bear Grylls. Giada de Laurentiis (or her writers) would fail Travel Writing 101 with the incessant commentary on “gorgeous sunsets” and “yummy dinners.” But with a famous family and other obvious assets, viewers probably give you a bit more leeway to suck.
5. Worst Guidebook Series People expect me to say Lonely Planet, but I actually think that LP is one of the best. I really don’t dig Fodor’s or Frommer’s – I am not their intended audience. That said, I’d argue that all guidebooks have weaknesses and they are best used as a simple tool for trip organization rather than a paint-by-the-numbers approach to travel.

Famous Travelers greyhound, lonely planet, LP, pig organs, Thomas Kohnstamm, venezuela, worst